Many of us are starting new jobs, on-boarding new team members, joining new volunteer organizations and more…all virtually. We would normally participate in team building activities to build trust. Now organizations want us to be productive within a week or two. Building trust with our co-workers, customers, partners and others is key to our success. We know this, yet we have not replaced our old trust building activities or thought through how we will develop trust quickly.
In his book, The Speed of Trust, Steven M.R. Covey links trust, time and cost. He states that as trust goes down, the speed of work decreases and costs go up. The reverse is true as well. As trust goes up, the speed of work increases and costs go down. So why, as many of us jump into new adventures, aren’t we focused on trust building? What can we do to build trust quickly? There are many experts who have researched and written on this topic. These are the characteristics which I find most critical to turbo boosting trust.
Speak Truth
Truth is not just honesty but also logic, as Harvard Business School professor Frances Frei says. Frei says trust depends upon the triangle of authenticity, logic and empathy. In her TEDTalk, she shares her concept of the logic triangle and leading with the big idea. We need to shoot straight and speak plainly. This means speaking the truth even when it is sometimes hard to hear. We may not want to tell a customer we are going to miss a deadline, our boss that we lost a sale, the committee that we cannot complete a task but we must be honest.
Honesty is not a license to be cruel or crass. We want to be empathetic, open and honest. One does not need to be rude when being honest. We just need to be thoughtful and be sure our communication is honest, accurate and considerate.
Be Authentic
This is a real challenge in today’s business environment where being different is not usually celebrated. This is not just about our personal preferences of where we live, family life, pets, faith, even the way we wear our hair. This is also about the way we like to learn, how we process information, and how we prefer to communicate.
Being authentic is about being you while respecting others as they are themselves. Here is an easy on for you. (True story)
My authentic self: I am a highly logical person. I like spreadsheets and bullets. If I have to scroll to read an email, I will move it to a task and schedule time to read it later. I use David Allen’s 2min rule for emails. This is how I prefer to communicate, how I best receive information, and how I can quickly process information.
Team member’s authentic self: He is a storyteller. If his emails were shorter than one page, I was so happy. When he came into my office for a “quick minute”, I usually smiled and asked if we could go get a cup of coffee because I knew I would want one. He liked to tell the “whole” story, not just the highlights and what I needed to do.
Together: We drove each other crazy for about two weeks. Then I asked if I could buy him a cup of coffee. I said how much I valued him, what I saw as his strengths, and got clear on what I needed (my time was really crunched, my brain processed information a certain way, etc). I asked how I could be a better partner for him. He gave me his list. We developed the plan.
Was it always perfect? No. Yet, we were able to be our authentic selves. When things went a little off the track, we just visited. We were both safe because we were honest and authentic with one another.
Listen and Go for the Win-Win
Have you read Stephen Covey’s 7 Habits of Highly Effective People? I know...that is throw-back. It was such an impactful book and program for me. I have been through the program three times. Do you remember the 4th and 5th habits? They are “think win-win” and “seek first to understand and then to be understood”. I truly believe active listening and then going for the win-win accelerates trust. People need to be heard, on a deep level. So many of us are in meetings and people are busy doing other things. We wonder if they are listening at all. Sarah Gershman published some great ideas in her Harvard Business Review article, Stop Zoning Out in Zoom Meetings. I have included a few below.
How can you convey you are really listening? How can you improve your listening?
Define your value before the meeting - Are you contributing? Are you looking for information? Define for yourself the return on investment for the meeting so you will ensure you get and give it.
Put away your cell phone - Enough said.
Turn on your video during remote meetings - This is especially true when speaking and asking questions. Presenters need visual feedback to know that people have taken in what they are trying to communicate.
Have a notepad and pencil ready - The physical act of taking notes helps keep your focus. Have these ready if you need them.
My challenge for you
Think about one person with whom you need to develop trust in the coming weeks.
(Thinking, thinking, thinking.)
Got the person in mind?
Now, each interaction you have with this person this week, pause and ensure you are:
Being authentic
Speaking the truth - honesty and logic
Listening and going for the win-win
Focusing on building trust one person at a time will help us build these muscles. Before we know it, we will be authentic with everyone, be speaking the truth always, listening and going for the win-win in all conversations.
Best wishes to you! Please connect with me on LinkedIn and let me know how your challenge goes. I would also love to hear what you believe are key factors in building trust.
Kommentarer