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Writer's pictureTina Marie Baugh

High value one on one meetings

Updated: Jul 17, 2020

We seem to be in a never ending number of meetings. If you are like me, you average more than 5 hours of meetings a day. This is more than 110 hours of meetings a month. According to a 2017 study done by Sapio, 15% of every hour-long meeting is wasted. This is 16.5 hours a month! This is assuming the rest of the meeting is worth our time. A 2019 survey by Korn Ferry shows that most of us believe we are only productive 70% of our day due to meetings. This means we really believe that we are wasting far more than that 15%. So how do we make those 110 hours of meetings productive? Start with your one on ones. You have full control over these, can make a large impact and these make up about 10% of your 110 hours a month. I promise, the investment will change things quickly.


Types of one on one meetings

There are three types of one on one meetings you are probably having. If you are not having all of these, you might consider them:

  • Direct reports - This is obvious. As leaders, we usually have three up to 30+ (bless you) direct reports. They deserve our time, attention and support.

  • Your boss or bosses - Again, obvious. I hope your boss is meeting with you regularly and providing you with time, attention and support.

  • Indirect reports - This one is not as obvious and I rarely see it done regularly. Even done once a year, it lets you know how your direct reports are actually performing, gives you face-time with up-and-coming talent, and gives you time in the field if you would like.

Each has a different cadence, purpose and agenda. The real question here is are you executing these meetings because you “should”, the way your old boss did, or with intentional thought about the outcome?


Get clear on what a good meeting looks like

Let’s think about the cost of a one on one for a minute. If the average salary of you and one of your direct reports is $100K (let’s keep the math simple), then an hour long meeting with the two of you costs about $100. No benefits, none of that; just straight salary. This is more than a cup of coffee, more than your lunch yesterday. Think if this was your personal money; you would want to see something tangible for that $100. Now, make sure you get that for your company. At the end of your one on one, what will be achieved, what relationship building will have gone on, every time, in general?

Many of us see these meetings as a chore, a time to work on projects, or a report-out to our boss. We do not think about what we actually want to achieve during these meetings or what the other person wants to achieve. We do not see these as paying $100 for an investment.

What might a clear target look like? Let’s take the most common meeting, the one with your direct report. The meeting guide might be:

  1. Meet 60 min twice a month

  2. I want to

    1. Hear the top things I might be missing which could bite me later

    2. Clear away anything for this person which might be blocking their progress

    3. Get any items I need for my projects or my boss

  3. Direct report wants to

    1. Hear from me that I know what they have achieved and that I understand their work (gratitude) and struggles

    2. Hash through any challenging situations, brainstorm options and develop tangling solutions he/she can use (no fluff)

    3. Discuss next steps in career every few meetings

Remember, this is about meeting both of your needs with a consistent and clear view of what “done” looks like. If you each invested $50 in the meeting, would you each feel it was a good investment?


Be consistent

Once you agree upon a general agenda and outcome that makes the time worth while, set the appointments and keep them. There is a few things consistent, reliable meetings will do for you

  • Consolidate questions - If your team members know they have dedicated time with you and that you most likely are not going to cancel or move the meeting, they will hold questions until the meeting. This can stop the bombardment of emails and drive-bys which can kill our productivity.

  • Prevent errors and miscommunication - As Elizabeth Grace Saunders states, canceling one on ones leads to miscommunication about expectations, errors in work and often more wasted time than what was freed up by canceling the original meeting.

  • Reinforce value - As Megan Hyatt points out, when you reschedule or cancel these meetings, team members also feel devalued or highly agitated because of the cascading impact to the rest of their schedule. Be aware that when we move a meeting, it impacts more than your schedule.


Be present

I am assuming if you are reading this, you care about your people and are looking for ways to improve the time you have with them. So, I am just going to put this out there. First, you need to actually care about the people with whom you work. If you do not, work on getting in touch with this part of yourself. Being genuine is a very deep topic and comes before all of this. Now that we have that out of the way, assuming you care about people, you need to be sure they know you are as invested in the hour (remember that $100) as they are.You need to model the behavior which you expect. This means:

  • Door closed - Many of us believe in an open-door policy but people deserve their time with you in private, uninterrupted. My door has three states:

    • Open - come on in,

    • Cracked - come in if you need to, I working but can be interrupted,

    • Closed - emergencies only, I’m in a meeting or heads-down working - Most of my one on one meetings are with the door closed, unless we are both really cold.

  • Devices down or shared - As IT leaders we often do need to show work, discuss graphs and such. We cannot be 100% devices down. I set up meetings so that my screen is shared on a monitor so we can see what I am typing, usually have the shared agenda on the screen and then we can pass the screen back and forth. Neither one of us checks our phone unless it is the distinct call of a Code Green, entire technology system down.

  • Active listening - Engage your entire body in active listening. If you are not familiar with this, again, invest some time in educating yourself in this area. There are many great resources out there. Here is one from MindTools. This ensures you are fully present with the conversation, not thinking about the 100 other tasks on your plate today. This person is worth your time.


My challenge for you this week is to block two one-hour spots on your calendar within the next 10 days to:

  1. Determine the amount of time you spend a year in one on one meetings

  2. Sit with that number for about 2 min and think, “WOW, if those were really effective meetings, we could move the needle on things.”

  3. For each meeting type, write down what you want to accomplish, in general, from the meetings.

  4. Now, do the same for the other participant.

  5. Set up a new one on one meeting format.

  6. Determine your communication plan.

I promise, if you make this investment in time you will see a tremendous difference in the effectiveness of your team, your relationships will grow and your own confidence as a leader will increase. Remember to not let the enemy of good be great here. Try something and adjust as needed. Make each $100 one on one meeting worth the investment.

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